Bismi's Gold An Fork, Melbourne CBD, Indian

Venue: Bismi Gold An Fork
Address: 380 Elizabeth St Melbourne 3000
Phone: 03 96544060

[Apologies if one character appears more heroic than the other :-) - Chai ]

Chai : Welcome to the first tandem foodie review. Today Blogger X (anonymous, cos I hadnt consulted her regarding disclosure, which wouldnt have been a PROBLEM if she wasnt so BUSY as to being unable to complete this review. Anyway, henceforth known as X) and I (ditto C) are walking towards Bismi Gold An Fork, an Indian restaurant located near the north east corner of Elizabeth and La Trobe St, on the fringes of the Melbourne CBD.

X : Are we there yet?

Chai nods towards the shop sign that looms into view as they turn the corner onto Elizabeth St.

C : I do remember having difficulty finding this place the first time.

X : Is there a mis-spelling here?

[insert meaningless chatter about how it could be the “A” in error, which would make it GoldEn or the missing “D” which would make it “Gold and Fork” which is at fault. Ask them? Yes, that would be optimal but nowhere near as interesting.]

We enter the restaurant and it is reasonably busy. Tables are scarce and after a short strategy meeting, X goes to place her order while C mills around some potential leavers. Having been there several times before, C concludes that it is always like this, ie. difficulty in getting a table. This is one of the reasons why C doesnt come here as often. The other? It takes a little long to prepare your food, which is good and bad, whch C supposes.

C glances around and notes that the majority of the patrons appear to be from the subcontinent. This always bodes well, from a culinary perspective.

Having managed to snag a table (possibly cos the previous occupants felt uncomfortable with C hanging around close enough to hear their conversations), when X returned, they do the tag team and C goes off to place his order. The queue is reasonably long and is moving a little on the slow side.

[This is where X's impression of the place would have appeared].

C returns clutching his food docket. X is gently rocking to the Bollywood music in the background.

X : I like the music. It's good music.

C : Really? It's kind of loud. What did you end up getting?

It appears that X had ordered a Chicken Masala with some Roti and C had yet again ordered a Chicken Murtabak, for his murtabak research, apparently.



The PA annouces X's docket number. X's chicken masala looks good. The roti even better. It's crispy and flakey plus lots and lots of gastronomic adjectives.

X gently tears at the roti (a.ka. bread, colloquially), stroking the bread whilst making little strips from it. She tenderly dips the strips into the marsala and gently brings it up towards her slightly parted quivering lips, almost caressing it.

C : Ummm, dont wait for me.

As the slightly dripping soaked roti enters her mouth, X rolls her eyes, as the pleasure from that first mouthful envelopes all her tastebuds.

C: Good?

X makes some earthy throaty sound.

All that moaning and groaning was making C very hungry. C's docket number is eventually called and he goes to collect his murtabak. It too is served on a multi compartment stainless steel platter. In one of the compartments was some sort of curry gravy for the murtabak.

C (gulps) : Looks pretty good. Want to try some?

C cuts a bit off for X to try.

C : You like?
X makes another earthy throaty sound.

C: Homer Simpson, right?

X : Huh? Dont watch the Simpsons.

C : Hmm, my curry is a tiny bit sour for my taste.

However, on trying X's marsala, C remarks that her curry is certainly very tasty and superior to the one that C was given.

C finishes the rest of the murtabak without the curry, cos it really didnt need it.

[This is where X's impression of food would have appeared]

X : That music is really getting on my nerves.

C : I know what you mean.

All up, C's paid $6.50 for his murtabak and $2.50 for his coke and X paid a lot for hers.

C : Shall we go? There are all these people milling around waiting for an empty table and they're making me feel uncomfortable.

Rating : Chai gives this 7/10 for food and 9/10 for value.

There is a small possibility that X will append her version of events ala Rashomon.

Restaurant Air - Chadstone - A La Carte

[Reprint. Originally published 18 June 2006]

Venue: Restaurant Air
Address: Level 1, David Jones Store, Chadstone Shopping Centre, Princes Highway, Chadstone
Parking: Free. David Jones carpark located Cnr Chadstone Rd and Dandenong Rd, entrance available from either road
Opening Hours: Mon - Wed 9am-5:30pm, Thurs - Fri 9am-9pm, Sat 9am-5pm, Sun 10am-5pm
Price Range: $7 for cake, $12-18 light meals
Link: http://www.davidjones.com.au/stores/chadstone.jsp

I have been to Restaurant Air on two occasions during the past couple of weeks. One was lunch on a weekend with my husband, Logan, and the other was dinner with a group of people from work on a Thursday night.

Being slightly boring (and a fan of the saying "If it ain't broke, don't fix it"), I ordered the Salt and Pepper Calamari on a bed of salad both times. On each occasion the dish was cooked slightly differently but both were delicious. At our lunch, Logan ordered the All Day Breakfast and proceeded to devour his plate of eggs, bacon, mushrooms, tomato, crusty bread and hash brown.

The staff were rushed off their feet. We were having some difficulty attracting the attention of the waiting staff after our ordered glasses of water failed to appear. Logan also requires copious amounts of sugar in his coffee and we couldn't catch anyone's eye to ask for an amount supplementary to the "one teaspoon" paper-encased serve that arrived with his drink. It was a fantastic cup of coffee all the same.

Prime position is a seat by the large window that stretches the length of the restaurant although I think this has more to do with the warmth of the sun coming through than the view of the car park...

Patrons were happily talking among themselves, camcordering sweet, young, cherubic children, or settling crying babies. (The restaurant _is_ accessed through the childrens' clothes section of the store.) There were also people queueing for tables so we decided against staying for something from their beautiful array of cakes, which I have gladly sampled on a previous occasion, and continued with our shopping.

Dinner with some of my work friends was a more sedate affair and, with a smaller number of occupied tables in the restaurant on this occasion, we had just the right amount of attention lavished on us. The others on my table ordered the Fish and Chips, Tandoori Chicken salad with mango dressing, Steak and the Smoked Trout Tart. The Tart was so good that one member of the table asked for a copy of the recipe to be emailed to her and they dutifully took her details.

We decided that we had enough room for dessert and I ordered some Sticky Date Pudding which arrived warmed, surrounded by a moat of butterscotch sauce and with just the right amount of King Island Cream dolloped on the side. Yum! There were cheesecakes and lemon tart and someone ordered a Pavlova Nest with Berry Compote. Mmm, delicious.

Although we were a table of seven, they cheerily allowed us to each pay separately at the till at the end of the evening. We left the restaurant very satisfied and there was still enough time to do some more shopping at "Chadstone - The Fashion Capital".

All in all, they were very nice meals. I do recommend booking a table for lunch on the weekends if you are definitely wanting to eat there as it is a very popular spot. There can be problems with service when they are busy with a lunch crowd but any issues are quickly rectified if mentioned which is all, I think, you can ask for.

The food was great, they probably could have done with another member of staff on the floor the weekend we visited but I like the place all the same. Four out of five Toorak Tractors.

Reviewed by Riss.

Fifteen Melbourne

Location:
Basement, 115 – 117 Collins Street (Enter through Georges Parade)
Melbourne Victoria 3000

Opening Hours:
Monday - Saturday, Lunch 12 to 3.00pm and Dinner 6 to 10pm
Closed Sundays

Reservations:
1300 799 415



(Image courtesy of Ms. Phil)

It wasn’t until after I finished my dining experience at Fifteen Melbourne that I really asked myself the question “Why is it that I chose to eat here tonight instead of say, Vue de Monde or Ezards or any other equally pricy degustation restaurant?”

Sure, the most obvious motive to dine at Fifteen is the restaurants’ relationship with Jamie Oliver himself. How can one not be attracted to the idea of a superstar chef whose knowledge and passion for fresh produce and a casual, slap-up approach to cooking has driven the once kitchen fearing water burner back into the cuccina. Those armed with one of Oliver’s many tomes and a willingness to undertake his Italian inspired fare-made-easy behave like they were born to it.

Oliver made cooking and food sexy again and the wives/girlfriends/lovers of the world thank him for it.

And with this already winning combination of excellent food and sexiness, let us add to the mix Jamie Oliver’s celebrity lifestyle which boasts Madonna, David Beckham and Brad Pitt as his best mates. Who wouldn’t want to spend a night at Fifteen in the hope that some of that elusive fairy dust might sit on your shoulders just for one night?

But let us not forget the Fifteen project itself? Most of us know about Oliver’s much publicised vision to provide employment opportunities for disadvantaged youngsters by bestowing them the skills and the framework to become superstar chefs not unlike himself. And it is indeed a truly wonderful idea. Even if the lustre of television and celebrity association tarnishes in time, these now fledgling chefs will eventually have the transferable skills to make a go of it in pretty much any commercial kitchen in the world. And that is a wonderful gift.

So is Jamie Oliver, the Fifteen program and the six month long wait list for a table reason enough for seven of my chums and I to spend an evening eating the finest food Fifteen can provide and to lay down a cool $1000 for the privilege of it?

And aside from the Oliver hyperbole as well as my beloved SJX's desire to have a photo taken with Toby Puttock from ‘Ready Steady Cook’, the fact of the matter is, I went to Fifteen primarily for the immensely glorified food.

And in short, the cuisine was horribly disappointing.

Being a self considered foodie-type, what with the considerable sum of my annual salary going towards my hedonistic lifestyle of good eating and drinking, given the reputations of all involved, my expectations were reasonably high.

But that burst of anticipation, swiftly vanished when I was presented with the six course tasting menu, which was given to us in a post-80’s fluorescent pink paint splashed folder, which didn’t seem to share any cohesion with all the other manner of fashionable funk displayed at Fifteen Melbourne. I can only describe this décor as something that will no doubt be out of style as soon as this current nu-wave revival decides to bury itself again for another 20 years. But more on this later.

A sinking heart followed my first course of proscuitto salad with peach, buffalo mozzerella and ‘micro’ herbs after it was presented to the table. All the ingredients were fresh of course, to go alongside the ethos of the establishment and presented in that discernable tasting size portions, but it was a just a little bit dull and certainly didn’t kick off the tasting menu experience and our enthusiasm for more.

This was followed by sardine fillets, baked with a pinenut, fennel seed and lemon zest. This dish was good but not radiant. The sardines were tender and moist, with a crust that was inventive and flavoursome. A resurgence of optimism came from our table after this dish however I couldn’t help feeling like the food wasn’t going to get much better.

Meanwhile, our vegetarian counterparts were presented with zucchini flowers with a basil aioli in lieu of the sardines. This dish looked green and well, saucy. It was difficult to tell what was actually sinking under the aioli. I didn’t get to sample this dish, however when I asked Elaine how it tasted, she responded with a lacklustre “Meh.” No points scored from the vegetarians on this one.

Moving right along to the pasta course, we were presented with some exceptional options and some that were not so great. I chose the Fifteen ravioli with bio dynamic ricotta, free range egg yolk and served with a white asparagus and butter broth. It was quite possibly the best item on the entire menu and an absolute gastronomic triumph. This pasta, with a hint of citrus and delicate, runny egg yoke nestled around the ricotta centre made me demand to see the man who made this dish so I could personally thank him for his efforts. It was utterly superb!

The other pasta courses were regrettably not as thrilling. An dreary stracci with cherry tomato, basil, balsamic and parmesan dish was seriously yawn inducing, and not because of its simplicity but merely because this tomato based pasta lacked any inspiration whatsoever. It was indeed the meal one makes for themselves when you can’t really be bothered cooking.

The pappardelle of rabbit ragu, mascarpone and parmesan didn’t rate so well either. The creamy mascarpone didn’t do the excessively salty and overcooked rabbit any favours. SJX frowned at the end of this course and someone at the other end of the table muttered “Why did that taste like milky fish?”

The remainder of the meal didn’t recover. The main of slow roasted lamb with alforno potatoes, spinach and black olive salsa was offered as cuts of meat that was so incredibly fatty, to actually consider it having any lamb underneath the fat at all was a doubtful conclusion. Oh, and did I mention that this ‘lamb’ was served cold? Unintentionally? My plate was cleared away with half of my meal still on it, consisting of cold lamb fat and a side of watery spinach.

Another main of grilled monkfish with Mount Zero Lentils and rainbow chard didn’t make it to the table until 15 minutes after everyone else had received their mains. And the verdict from Baby Dukes when asked? “It’s ok, I guess.” Hmmmm.

The vegetarian’s main option was crumbed eggplant with goats cheese and tomato sauce. Again, uneventful and left the vegos feeling ripped off at the lack of innovation with the cuisine.

A tiramisu ‘with a twist’ was presented as our dolce course. And the ‘twist’ was undercooked long grain rice in the bottom of a shot glass, topped with mascarpone and chocolate, served with crostolli sticks that were stale and coated in icing sugar.

The final course of bio-dynamic South Gippsland aged cheddar and a velvety double blue was enjoyed by the table, along with muscatels, pear and quince paste. The cheese was first-rate and appreciated given the calamity our taste buds tolerated throughout the sitting.

I also found it very difficult to relax at Fifteen. The hyper colour surroundings and intensely busy human traffic left me feeling rather unsettled. The décor is a mish-mash of unconsolidated styles (80’s urban graffiti meets Renaissance gilding meets Better Homes and Garden) and the designer seemed to not know what they wanted it to be. I did truly love the glass balls suspended from the ceiling doubling as herb pots, brimming with healthy sprigs of parsley and basil. Very cute indeed.

That’s not to say that the entire experience was a debacle. I must make special mention of the fact that the service was utterly, supremely flawless. Prudent wait staff made every effort to ensure our experience was pleasurable and endeavoured to grant our every whim including an introduction to the remarkable Paddy, gentle giant and Fifteen apprentice responsible for making the exquisite ravioli of eggy, cheesy love. Although our appointed waitress failed to deliver Toby Puttock to my beloved Shane for an introduction and photo-op (he was talking with his publicist, we were told), we noted that she did considerable leg work to oblige our request.

So would I eat at Fifteen again?

I am quite prepared to spend considerable sums of money on fantastic food but what I am not prepared to pay for is a reputation that doesn’t match its high calibre status.

I also don’t buy into the argument that because the chefs are students, I should perhaps not expect so much from Fifteen.

Would you be happy to pay the same prices if we were to eat similar substandard food prepared by an apprentice at another restaurant instead of the kids at Fifteen?

No?

Me either which is why you’ll not find me sitting at a table at Fifteen again.

I would much rather my money go to the William Angliss College and support the goals of their apprentices. I hear that the food is really very good and I am also comforted in the knowledge that the glory of cooking will forever be their own, and not Jamie Oliver’s.




In the provision of fairplay, please find a review from Vicious Ange who very much enjoyed the food at Fifteen.

Intermission

I suspect everyone is fasting at the moment but in the meantime, here are some food related articles from 2 of the crew that appeared in Tuesday's (17 Oct 2006) Epicure section of The Age.

There is To the Queens Taste
and Put Your Talk Where Your Fork Is.

Plus if you want to have a look at what places have been reviewed, check out the index.

ps
Drop us a note even if it is just to say hi.

The Great Pie Round Up

"'Um ... I know this may seem a somewhat esoteric question, but what's in the meat pies?'
'Meat.'
'And what kind of meat?'
'Ah, you want one of the gourmet pies, then?'"

Rincewind and Dibbler (Terry Pratchett, “The Last Continent”)

Well might you ask what’s actually in a pie. A veritable mystery parcel of tasty goodness. Though some of the carnivores shouldn’t look to closely to identify body parts (is that a snout I see?) or get too upset to find that the minimum 25% ‘meat’ content could legally be including soy protein into the count.

But here at We Do Chew Our Food we have it all - gourmet, homemade, frozen, vegan, big and small. Grab a comfy seat and enjoy The Inaugural Great Pie Review.


Four'n'Twenty pie
CWA Cafeteria, Royal Melbourne Show.
$4.00
Reviewer: Fluffy

Having lined up with the expectation that the CWA would be the place to get the quintessential home made country pie, there was, I'll admit it, crushing disappointment in the fact that the ladies were just there to stock the pie warmer. Still - best not let it affect objectivity.

*sniff*



Classic Four'n'Twenty pie, with (free) sauce.

Surprise twist! I give this pie a commendable 4 out of 5. The crust was buttery and crispy, the sauce was pleasantly sweet and vinegary. Temperature was perfect. The lost point is due to the filling which had an overly uniform 'slurry' texture.

Sargents Party Pies
Available from all good Supermarkets
Price: approx $5 for12 mini pies
Reviewer: debs

As a very infrequent pie eater (or anything with pastry/fat/tastes good for that matter), I wanted to get the most out of my pie experience. I opted for a pack of 12 Sargents Party Pies as my test subject for a fairly reasonable rate of around $5 for the packet.

With great anticipation I put the dozen pies (frozen) on a tray and popped them in the oven for the allocated 10-15 minutes. 25 minutes later and still with half cooked pies, my determination to eat those delectable morsels was wavering, but finally after around double the "suggested" time, they were ready!

The pastry was tasty and crisp, however the little "lids" of the pies didn't come off easily and if you, like me, enjoy the little ritual of peeling them off, putting in the sauce and putting the lids back on before eating, then like me you would have ended up with a rather mangled looking party pie in the end.

The meat/gravy combination was very pleasant with none of those little gristly bits that you often have to spit out of other, lesser quality party pies and overall myself and my pie eating companion were quite satisfied with our tasty and indulgent lunch.

Overall quality: Quite satisfied
Overall taste: Quite delicious
Overall appearance: Before ripping off tops, quite good: after, not so good
Overall rating: 4/5

Warning: Pulling off top and allowing centre to cool a little before consumption is well recommended. Those little buggers sure can scold!

Brumby’s Pepper Steak Pie
Brumby's, Williamstown
Cost:$3.50 bought cold and heated at home :-)
Reviewer: Liz

Pastry: flaky on top, with black pepper bits for decoration/identification. Sides uniformly textured and tasty.
Filling: plenty of fine mince in gravy and surprisingly no nasty or chewy bits. Not too much gravy either. A little heavy on the pepper for my taste but I guess you’d be annoyed if it were light on the pepper!
Pretty good. 4/5. Has to be chunky steak to score a 5 with me.

Herbert Adams Mixed Vegetable Pastie
$5.50 for 4
Reviewer: Susanne

So who knew pie shops were closed on Sundays? I do now. After finding the two pie shops I could think of shut I had to resort to a Herbert Adams Mixed Vegetable Pastie from Safeway ($5.50 for a pack of four). My god, it's not even a pie. Oh well, us vegetarians have to make the best of what's available I guess.

On the box the pie is described as "A delicious medley of the finest garden vegetables encased in our Famous Flaky Pastry." This is a, er, generous description.

The pie smelt yummy, and the pastry had a nice texture, but it was slightly bland, as were the "delicious medley" of vegies. It tasted nicer once I loaded on the "dead horse" to give it a bit of flavour (tomato sauce for those not down with aussie lingo).

Basically, the pie was as good as I would have expected a supermarket-bought product to be, and it filled a need. It was passable as an easy snack, but I don't think I'd buy this particular range again. I give it two stars out of five.

I'm still hanging out for the specialty pie I missed out on today, and a frozen product just doesn't compare...

Ferguson Plarre Steak Pie
From Ferguson Plarre at Victoria Market
$3.50 bought cold and heated at home :-)
Reviewer: Liz

Pastry: excellent. Evenly flaky and light on top, lovely flavour. I really wanted to do that rather unattractive thing I did as a kid, which was to eat the top and the filling and leave the pastry case until last! ...but I resisted as there were others present! Filling: excellent too! Tasty fine mince in gravy and again, no chewy or gristly bits. (Nasty bits ruin the whole experience in my view!)
4/5 As good a mince pie as you’ll find. Sadly, Ferguson’s don’t do a chunky steak pie.

Vegan, tofu topped pie

Natural Tucker: 809 Nicholson Street, North Carlton VIC 3054
Cost: $4.00
Reviewer: Another outspoken female

What makes a pie? A pastry case, a wet chunky filling? So what do we make of a combination of vegetables and rice in a spicy sauce sitting in a sourdough bread case, topped with whipped tofu and poppy seeds? Delicious! This is the pie you have when you are not having a pie, or when you are vegan. The pastry being animal product-free is non-greasy and won’t make you feel queasy, but on the downside – ‘aint got no flake. It is relatively thin and doesn’t dominate the experience, just provides a wholesome vehicle for the other ingredients. The vegetables included: sweet potato, potato, carrots, peas (10)* and a little brown rice in a thick tasty gravy.

Verdict: 4/5 - die hard followers of the meat pie probably won’t go for it but it’s a flavoursome and healthy variation.

* I hate peas, so anything under a dozen I can navigate my way around, without being seriously denied of content. I once counted 30 peas in a vegetable pastie, you can see why i didn't review that one!


Spinach, ricotta and pine-nut pie
Pie-supplier: Babka, 358 Brunswick Street Fitzroy
Pie-price: $4.55 takeaway or $9.75 (with bread, salad and chutney)
Reviewer: Michael from Where's the beef?

I had high hopes for Babka's pies - they figured in Cheap Eats' "Take 3 - Pies" and the vego options were enthused about specifically. The slight wait for tables at midday on a Tuesday was a further reason to expect particularly delicious food. There were two vegetarian pie options on the menu (as well as a pastie). I opted for spinach, ricotta and pine nut (which I'll eventually get around to reviewing), while Cindy had pumpkin, tomato and basil. The pies could be purchased takeaway on their own, but we were keen to sit and paid double to eat in, with bread, salad and chutney as accompaniments. The pastry was sprinkled with sesame seeds and was reasonably crisp, if not quite perfectly golden, while the pie filling was a pretty decent mix of wilted spinach and ricotta with just a smattering of pine nuts. The whole thing was fairly reminiscent of one of the cheap spinach and cheese filo rolls you can get for about two bucks from Baker's Delight, and while I enjoyed it (the chutney was particularly tasty), it didn't quite measure up to my expectations (or the price tag).

Rating: 3/5




Tony’s Steak Pie

Cost $3.00 or less if you do the pie drive thing.
Place: Tony’s Pies
341 Sommerville Road, Kingsville 3012
Reviewer: Husky Nutmeg

When my parents arrived in Australia in the 50’s, the only pies they knew about had fruit in them. Not having much of a grasp of English, Mum bought a few pies, which looked delightful, expecting to bite into a cold cinnamon spiced, apple pie. Needless to say, meat pies didn’t have much of a presence during my childhood.

So my review: I enjoyed my pie - it was meaty enough to taste like a meal and there weren't any ugly or chewy surprises. With my own judgement being arguably warped, I opted to share said pies with Mip and her cousins, aged between 5.5 and 9.8. The kids' verdict – too bland without sauce. There most definitely needs to be the addition of sauce and preferably chips on the side. Having said that, they added this could have been the best pie they ever tasted had their auntie/mother not cooked them in the microwave (What?!! They were hungry!).

Chicken Chasseur / Flemish Beef Pie

Belgian Beer Cafe Eureka
5 Riverside Quay
Southbank - Melbourne
Cost: $12.50 (...but it does come with a quenelle of potato mash, pea stoemp and gravy)
Reviewer: Mellie

The Belgian Beer Cafe is better known for its beer, pots of mussels and pomme frits than for its pies. But in the spirit of the inaugural "We Do Chew Our Food" Pie Review, I thought I would sample one of their lesser know menu items. And I must say, I am somewhat impressed (...the fact that I lined the stomach with a few crisp Hoegaardens did nothing to influence that summation either ;-))

The Elegant Gourmand and I divied up the two pies on offer - a Flemish Beef Pie that was tender and meaty in all the right places, but lacked a certain savoury punchy taste. Then the Chicken Chasseur Pie, which was an absolute winner. A flavoursome wine infused tomato sauce married tender chicken pieces, mushrooms, sliced onions, garlic and thyme into a tasty little parcel. The pastry was flaky and crisp, although the light gravy tended to saturate the pastry, causing sogginess (but it was moreish nonetheless). The filling was generous and of good quality; nice to find real meat in a pie for a change. The sides on the other hand were hit and miss. The hit was the use of real fresh peas in the pea stoemp (mash), the miss was the cold mash potato. But a nicely presented dish, although perhaps a little pricey for a "bar snack".

Rating:
Chicken Chasseur Pie: 5
Flemish Beef Pie: 3.5
The Beer: Priceless

Ed at Tomatom has blogged his review. No ratings, but you get the feeling he enjoyed every forbidden mouthful of his Baker d Chirico meat pie. Read about the delicious, gory details.

The "just proving the editor doesn't interfere with creative licence" review

Veggie korma pie
Location: Myer Bourke St, ground floor, food court.
Price: $2.something...(think it was half price cos it was almost 5:00pm)
Reviewer: Rachana

Served on a paper plate shoved inside a paper bag. The Pie looks yummy & is warm-ish. 1 shudn't need ketchup wit a gud pie, so i didn't get any. Has sesame seeds, some green herbs & yellow & red powder (spices i assume) sprinkled on top. Oh btw I am cheating...it ain't a meat pie. It's a veggie korma pie. But honestly, with my asian background its only right for me to be reviewing some hybrid (east-meets-west) sort of pie. So anyways the lady behind the counter recommended this over their beef pies. Oh & Myer only stocks Boscastle pies & they claim to have a passion for food so my expectations are set pretty high.

All my pie experiences (barring Myer fc) have been gawd-aweful. But Boscastle have always managed 2 satisfy in the past....so here goes....

Score: 4

Reasons:

1 Flaky pastry cooked just right. not chewy nor soggy nor hard. jst rite.
+1 Filling includes potatoes, carrots, peas etc in some yellowish sauce - so they did mean veggies
+1 Curry sauce is mild, can taste some turmeric & something else. A bit sweet but tastes alright with the pastry, besides it did say 'korma' so shoudln't be spicy. A touch of pepper wouldn't have gone amiss though.
+1 Didn't miss a sauce on the side, which means the filling must ave been right & there was enough gravy
-1 A bit too hot on the inside - so nearly burnt my tongue in the 1st bite - ok so maybe my impatience isn't a defect in the pie but hey it's my review so i can score on woteva i like.

besides i think 4 on 5 for a humble Pie is a generous score. So yea if ur after a reliable & good pie-experience, Myer food court or anywhere that serves Boscastle should be a safe bet.


I made it myself

Cindy's I-can't-believe-it's-not-meat pies
Pie maker extraordinaire: Cindy from Where's the beef?

Spinach and cheese are great in pastry, and curried lentils aren't half bad either. But they don't quite fit the bill if you're vegetarian and you want protein soaked in gravy and tomato sauce. When I first discovered TVP (textured vegetable protein) at my local supermarket, I set about developing an imitation of your run-of-the mill, corner-shop variety meat pie. I've got a bit lazy in the presentation stakes, stuffing squares of pastry into a muffin tin, but the key ingredients are there. Store-bought puff pastry flakes up pretty well, and it takes some restraint not to overfill these with brown gravy flavour.
Want to give 'em a go? The recipe's here.
It would be immodest of me to rate my own recipe, but my pie-lovin' partner hasn't looked longingly at a "real" meat pie in years.

Honourable mentions
Not quite reviews but honourable mention go to:

Armaniac voted for "My local pub, the Albion, in Nth London, had a beef, ale and stilton pie. Everything else is just a pretender..." which is a pity as he now lives in downtown Northcote (Melbourne), so that makes it one very expensive pie.

Liz Cincotta (of The Age's Top 5 foods fame) narrowed down her top 5, to give her top 2 favourite pie makers to us:
Molly Mae's Cafe, 101 High Street, Broadford, phone 5784 3949
Mt Martha Fine Foods, 34 Lochiel Avenue, Mount Martha, phone 5974 4407

...and for those who get 'sweet' and 'savoury' a little confused

Hot Apple Pie

Purchased from: McDonald's Family Restaurant, Endeavour Hills

Cost: $1.95

Reviewer:BEVIS

Pastry: Crunchy and tasty, not too hot. Very tasty but makes you thirsty (intentional, I'm sure).

Filling: Piping hot chunks of apple (no false advertising here!) and a sauce that makes your mouth water.

Packaging: An easy flip-open cardboard casing enables the consumer to hold the hot item without burning their fingers. The pie easily slides in and out of the covering, allowing for the consumer to place it in their handbag, manbag or similar to cool down for a few minutes if the internal heat of the item in question is not to the consumer's personal preferences.

Rating: Four stars out of five. I cannot find much fault with the pie, but I like to encourage the makers to continually "strive for a five".

But what would we know?

If the mystery meats in the average pie don't put you off, the experts at the Australian Consumer Association have found out more than most of us want to know about the top brands of Aussie meat pies. See how they rate them.

Better late than never

Missed the first round up but feel inspired to write a review of the best pie in your world? Well, ask nicely, mail it in and we'll add yours to the Great Pie Round Up.

Mince pie
Sunny Anh Hot Bread
Watton Street, Werribee
Cost: $2.20
Reviewer: Anna

I tasted many pies in the spirit of this review, but really can only, in good conscience, review one. It was from Sunny Anh Hot Bread on Watton Street in Werribee, for a cost of $2.20 with free sauce. If the lady behind the counter is to be believed it's made by her, from finely ground steak. To be sure, the filling seemed like quite finely minced meat with no gristle to be found, and the gravy was quite thick, holding everything together well, with just a pinch of pepper (how I like it), and was a good eating temperature, ie. warm without burning my tongue. The pastry was
light and flaky, but not so much that just cutting into it resulted in a pastry-flake storm all over the table and my lap.

I score it a 4 out of 5. Anyone out in the Werribee area looking for a light lunch, get your pie here (there are other hot bakes and cafes, but I found this the best for under $5).



Review rangling initiated and put together by Another Outspoken Female. Thanks for the participation and fearless chewing of all who were involved.

The inaugural “We Do Chew Our Food” pie review

Melbourne, the home of We Do Chew Our Food, is paradoxically the epicentre of both the best Australian cuisine and Football. When you put the two together they spell one word – PIE. The meat pie with tomato sauce (ketchup) is perhaps the most iconic Australian dish and almost mandatory to eat at any major sporting event. It even has it’s own Wikipedia entry. Thankfully for the vegetarians amongst us – there’s a lot more to pies these days than that first “Four‘nTwenty”.

In honour of the footie Grand Final next Saturday (30th September) and after the success of the recent great sausage roll review, we are now throwing the challenge open to the wider food loving community to send us a pie review from their own town. This savoury morsel can be bought or homemade, meat or vegetarian, gluten-free or caeliac-unfriendly, traditional or contemporary.


Guidelines for the review:

1. If the pie is bought – supply the address, price and description of the pie.
2. If homemade – include the recipe.
3. Taste the pie before you slather it with sauce/ketchup/chutney (sacrilege for some I know!). Is the pastry flaky, how generous is the filling, does the description of the contents equate with what you find in it?
4. Rate the pie from 1 to 5: (1 being the lowest and 5 being the highest).
5. You are welcome to send a picture, but you don’t have to.
6. Send your review to chewyfood@gmail.com by midnight, Sunday 1st October (note: for those in the northern hemisphere, that means midday Sunday for most of you).
7. Have fun!

The full review will be posted on We Do Chew Our Food the next day.

A sausage roll!

By the mystic regulation
Of our dark Association,
Ere you open conversation
With another kindred soul,
You must eat a sausage roll!

(Chorus)
You must eat a sausage roll! A sausage roll!

If, in turn, he eats another,
That’s a sign that he’s a brother –
Each may fully trust the other.
It is quaint and it is droll,
But it’s bilious on the whole.

(Chorus)
Very bilious, very bilious on the whole!

It’s a greasy kind of pasty,
Which, perhaps, a judgement hasty
Might consider rather tasty:
Once (to speak without disguise)
It found favour in our eyes.

(Chorus)
It found favour, it found favour in our eyes!

But when you’ve been six months feeding
(As we have) on this exceeding
Bilious food, it’s no ill-breeding
If at these repulsive pies
Our offended gorges rise!

But, But,

Women:
Yes, at these repulsive pies
Our offended gorges rise! But, But,

Men:
Yes, at these repulsive pies
Our offended gorges rise!
Our offended gorges rise!
Our gorges rise!

All:
By the mystic regulation
Of our dark Association,
Ere you open conversation
With another kindred soul,
You must eat a sausage roll!

A sausage roll, a sausage roll!
A roll, a roll, a sausage roll!
A sausage roll!

(Chorus)
You must eat a sausage-roll, a sausage roll, A roll, a roll, a roll, a roll, a roll, a sausage roll! A roll, a roll, a sausage roll! A sausage roll!



"By the mystic regulation"
The Grand Duke
Gilbert and Sullivan





And such was the decree I issued to my associates at We Do Chew Our Food Inc. AKA the Super Friends. Steely eyed, I took my time to meet the gaze of each member at the Justice League boardroom table that day. This was an important project – but was it important enough to die for? Eating of the sausage roll is not without its dangers. The bad guys known to associate with the riff raff of the pie warmer crowd are a truly nasty bunch – E. coli, botulism, salmonella – the act of stuffing a sausage roll in the old pie hole is not dissimilar to holding a loaded gun to your head and playing Russian Roulette.

A delicious, toasty loaded gun. With sauce.

If it weren’t for the occasional freaking outstanding sausage roll, what reasonable person would suffer all the inedible greasy over-salted filth which passes for take away goodness? At its best, the sausage roll is foodie brilliance. Engineered to be gob shaped at the cross section, representing as many food groups as you like, edible out of a bag, flaky, delicate yet robust. Finding the perfect sausage roll was a quest worth dying for.

Or as any good general worth her salted squid knows, it is, at least, a quest worth sending others out to die for.





Reviewer: Chai

I told my 9 y.o. kid the We Do Chew Our Food bloggers were going to do a sausage roll review.

"Everyone?"
“Almost everyone”, I said.
"What if they don’t like sausage rolls?"
“You don’t have to like it. You just eat it and review it.”
"What if you cant eat one? What if you have Celiac's disease?"
[silence]

Okay, the sausage roll was made on the premises. It was freshly made. Could not taste any traces of sulfate.

Location: Somewhere in Camberwell.
Not identified cos it's not exactly an endorsement and I don’t want to be responsible for depriving anyone of their livelihood.

Not acceptable Chai! This is about punishing the evil and rewarding the good. We’re not called the freakin Justice League for nothing - Ed.

Time of consumption: 9.45 a.m.
Cost: $2.40
Pastry: Was not flaky. Had toasted breadcrumbs on it, which made it sort of crispy/crunchy. Novel. Not unpleasant.

Filling: It tasted fine, a little on the bland side and not overly salty like those mass produced rolls. Unfortunately, perhaps it contained a little too much filler. You couldn’t really taste the meat, per se. Also, there was a slight aftertaste. My palate is not sophisticated enough to identify it. Something along the lines of oregano.

Tomato sauce: Optional at 20c per pouch.





Score : An edible 6 out of 10.




Reviewer: Mellie
Name: Hanna's Bakeshop
Address: 172 High Street, Ashburton, VIC, 3147
Phone: 9885 3787
Open: 7 days
Cost: $2.20, plus an extra $0.20 for squeezy sauce

Not being a huge sausage roll fan, mainly due to an aversion of second rate slimy sausage mince, I decided to take on the challenge of the We Do Chew Our Food Great Sausage Roll Review and overcome my bizarre disinclination. So I ventured down to the local bakery, Hanna's Bakeshop in Ashburton, and threw myself into the task wholeheartedly. Surprisingly, the sausage roll was damn yummy, and not brick-like in that sausage mince kind of way. It was heartily full-flavoured and contained perceptible gratings of carrots and a few mushed up peas. The pastry was flaky and buttery and not at all soggy, and it arrived piping hot from the pie warmer. Alas, I decided to bring it home for consumption, pairing it with a particularly good bush tomato ketchup.









Reviewer: Liz
Michels Patisserie, Victoria Gardens Shopping Centre, Burnley.
Pastry: It had a texture like damp cardboard with a few flaky bits here and there.
Filling: no obvious meat texture – highly processed sausage meat, possibly containing breadcrumbs, plus a few bits of onion and plenty of white pepper.
Temperature: ok, bit on the cool side.
Tomato sauce: squeezy pack for 30c – outrageous!

Overall comment: Undoubtedly mass produced. Extremely average, no better than a Four ‘n Twenty.

OR… make your own
As a contrast, I thought I’d provide my family’s recipe for the ultimate home made party sausage rolls. Flaky pastry from your supermarket freezer – couldn’t be easier or better.

1kg sausage mince (plastic tube at supermarket)
1 finely chopped onion
Handful of chopped parsley (optional)
4-5 sheets of puff pastry (Pampas or similar from supermarket freezer)


Mix sausage mince, onion and parsley in a bowl – use your hands if you like.

Cut pastry sheet in half. Place a log of sausage mixture (approx 2cm in diameter) along one of the long edges of the pastry. Brush a line of milk or egg along the other long edge of the pastry and roll the meat side towards the milk side. (The milk helps the two layers stick.) You can now cut into smaller 5cm rolls or as big as you like. We usually score the top of the pastry a couple of times by making a couple of 1cm cuts in the top of the pastry roll. This helps steam get out I presume and it looks good. Finally, brush the top with remaining milk/egg to get a nice golden brown top.

Place rolls on a greased or baking paper covered baking tray and bake at 200 degrees (C) for 20-25 mins until golden brown.

Optional: many people add grated carrot to the mince mix but I prefer the purist recipe.




Reviewer: LadyCracker
Name: Hanna's Bake Shop
Address: 172 High St Ashburton VIC 3147

A Saturday ritual in our household is to head to Hanna's Bake Shop with the paper and two little girls in tow to savour the flaky goodness of the bakery's pies and sausage rolls. This weekend was a little different as it was a lonesome Ladycracker catching up on the goings on in the little paper while chowing down on one of the best sausage rolls in Melbourne. Light pastry complements the medium warm temperature of the roll (no burnt mouths here). The filling is a traditional no frills meat mince that doesn't feeling heavy or claggy, leaves plenty of room for a fluffy vanilla milkshake and is tasty without the ubiquitous tomato sauce addition. Life doesn't get any better.




Reviewer: MelbourneGirl

I tested out of the Pattie's party pack: 18 party pies and 12 little sausage rolls.

The sausage rolls had soft pastry, which wasn't flaky. The filling was bland and mushy. I ate half of one, and didn't want the other half. Out of 5 I would give them 1. We only got those cause there were no Four’n’Twenty packs at the supermarket.




Reviewer: Husky Nutmeg

I would never have thought of a sausage roll as breakfast food but I was on the way to work and with coffee, anything is edible, I thought. I went to Tony’s Pies in Kingsville. These people already have a huge reputation for pies and pastries in the West as they do the school/kinder/club pie drives.

I was surprised by how hungry I was. The pastry was light, but not over flaky. A very tasty filling and no lardy aftertaste. There was take away sauce but the roll didn’t need it. The price was overshadowed by my latte (mind you, my coffee is always a large) and being my pre-work coffee spot, the service has always been friendly and kinda wholesome.




Reviewer: Fluffy
Name: Green Refectory
Address: Sydney Rd Brunswick VIC 3056
Cost: not sure – I think it came to $5.50 with my coffee

This review was a bit of a cheat in that I’ve had the sausage roll from Green Refectory before. The food there is uniformly good but the serving staff are generally hired more for their good looks. For this reason you can get someone serving you who is not really concerned that your pie is cold and your juice is hot.

I’ve previously enjoyed the sausage roll (homemade) as an eat-in affair plated up with salad and chutney. It was so excellent I would call it the sausage roll that other sausage rolls should aspire to in their sausagey dreams. This time I ordered it in traditional format: in a paper bag with sauce. The pastry was sprinkled with sesame seeds and nice and flaky without being insubstantial. The great shame on this occasion was it just wasn’t hot enough. Below a certain temperature the fats in the sausage roll solidify and give the whole thing an unfortunate waxy texture which could be completely avoided but for a few degrees.




Collaboration and introduction fiendishly devised by Fluffy.